


Her way

by phaseseeker



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: F/F, Worf&Dax did not happen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:22:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26892112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phaseseeker/pseuds/phaseseeker
Summary: s6e20 "His way", but it's Dax instead of Odo.
Relationships: Jadzia Dax/Kira Nerys
Comments: 11
Kudos: 9





	Her way

**Author's Note:**

> It's my first fanfic so forgive me if it's not any good.  
> Also English is not my mother tongue so...

O’Brien, Dax, Kira, Dr. Bashir and Jake Sisko were all standing at the far end of Vic’s lounge, getting ready to leave.

\- “Wait, where are you going? I haven’t introduced you to Vic yet” Bashir exclaimed  
\- “Introduce us… To an hologram?” Kira evidently still thought of holosuites as a waste of time  
\- “He’s no ordinary hologram, trust me… And it will only take two minutes”  
Kira figured she could wait… At least, she was enjoying the music  
\- “There he is” - he added, spotting the tuxedo-clad singer walking towards them – “Vic, let me introduce my colleagues… Chief Miles O’Brien”  
\- “Nice to meet you. You really miss your wife, eh?”  
\- “How do you know I’m married? Did Julian tell you?” the Chief was puzzled.  
\- “I didn’t tell him anything, Miles. He’s just really good at understanding people”  
\- “I guess so”  
\- “Here’s our captain’s son, Jake Sisko…” continued Bashir  
\- “Whose heart was broken recently, I think” guessed Vic while shaking Jake’s hand – “Don’t worry, pallie, there’s plenty of fish in the sea” Once again his guess was spot on.  
\- “And here’s Commander Dax and Major Kira”  
\- “Ladies…” - Vic said, kissing their hands; The two were confused  
\- “It’s an old human tradition” – explained Julian  
\- “What, no mind reading for us? Julian, I think that Felix’s ripped you of on this program” – Dax joked – “That, or he’s not used to people having a second brain in their stomach”  
Vic did have something to say about them: the very instant he saw them he knew there was something between them, something in the way they looked at each other. Was it just admiration, friendship? No, it was more than that, it was love, at least from Kira’s part, his experience couldn’t be wrong. But it also looked like the two were fighting that thought, as if they thought “No, it can’t work, I’m only imagining things”. He pondered for a bit, not knowing what to say.  
\- “Vic?”  
He had to come up with something, or they would start having suspects.  
\- “I’m sorry, commander, but it looks like those blue eyes of yours give problems even to us holoprograms” – he joked, finally, deciding not to tell anything about what he really saw - “And now, I’m afraid I have to leave. Wouldn’t want the customers to complain about the music!” - he added, as he rushed back on the stage.  
Kira, Dax, O’Brien, Jake and Bashir all laughed  
\- “Well, that was fun, but tomorrow morning I need to be up at 0400 to complete the shield system maintenance, so I’d better go to sleep. Good night everybody!”  
\- “Good night, chief” – the others answered, before deciding it was also better for them to go to sleep.

Kira looked at the ceiling for what seemed like the 100th time that night  
\- “Computer, what time is it?”  
\- “It is 0230”  
Great, she needed to be up for her shift in three hours and she still hadn’t slept a single minute. She could not understand what was keeping her awake, and to add to that she also couldn’t shake away that thought; She could’ve sworn Vic saw something when he looked at her and Jadzia, something he wanted to talk about but then decided it was better not to.  
\- “No, Vic’s only an holographic illusion, he certainly can’t “see” things, he probably just repeats the random same phrases to everyone, and this time managed to be right two times out of two”- she told herself.  
But the more she thought about it, the more her explanation seemed unsatisfactory, so she decided that if she couldn’t sleep, at least she could get an answer to her question.  
She put on her uniform, and started walking towards Quarks’s  
\- “Hi, Major, are you already up?”  
\- “Hi, Quark, I need a favor”  
\- “Anything”  
\- “Can you please give me Julian’s program, the one with Vic?”  
\- “What for, at three in the morning?”  
\- “That is none of your business, Quark”  
\- “Okay, okay, there it is. Anything else?”  
\- “No”  
Kira started walking towards the holosuite  
\- “Ah, Quark”  
\- “Yes?”  
\- “You’d better not tell anybody about this”  
\- “My lips are sealed, Major”  
Kira felt silly, staying up that late to talk to an hologram. But she needed answers. She entered the holosuite.  
\- “Computer, start program”  
A few moments late, Vic’s casino appeared.  
\- “Oh, welcome, Major” – said Vic, greeting her – “It’s a bit late, but if there’s a song you’d like to hear, we can play that for you”  
\- “I’m not here for music. I’m here because of what happened three hours ago”  
\- “Why, what happened three hours ago?”  
\- “When you saw me and Jadzia, i mean commander Dax, you looked like you had seen something”  
\- “Yeah, as I said to her before, i saw her beautiful eyes and…”  
\- “Is that all you saw?” - Kira cut him off  
\- “Not really. But I’m not sure you’d want to hear the rest”  
\- “Oh, come on”  
the major was starting to get angry  
\- “Well, I’ll tell you. It looked like you and commander Dax were more than friends”  
\- “Yeah, she’s my best friend”  
\- “It’s not what I mean. It looked like you two were attracted to each other. Romantically. At least you were”  
\- “Don’t be ridicolous!” - Kira exploded. But it wasn’t because she was offended. It was the only defense mechanism she knew. Vic had hit too close to home, and she could not let him analyze her feelings. They were only hers.  
\- “That confirms my suspicions” – Vic thought to himself  
\- “Well, looks like I was wrong. I’m sorry”  
\- “You’d better be”  
Kira’s cheeks were as red as her uniform. She decided if was better to leave  
\- “Computer, end program” – she added, shouting.  
On her way out, she thought it would be better to calm down a bit before going down, or else Quark would think she did prophets-know-what in that holosuite. 

From where she was she could see the dark sky. Space, how beautiful it was. She started thinking about all sorts of things. When she was younger, during the occupation, she often looked at the sky, letting her imagination run freely, escaping for a bit from what was around her; And thinking about the unknown, she forgot for a moment about her condition, about what was destroying Bajor, and felt a sense of freedom, in a way. Now she got to explore that space, in a way she never thought she could have. And it was wonderful. Bajor was still her home, but now she was on a space station, getting to know that space she had looked at so many times.  
The blue color she saw, however, inevitably reminded her of Jadzia’s eyes. Her thoughts shifted to the Trill. She was her best friend. She was one of the few people she always felt secure with. The one she could tell everything, her fears, her deepest thoughts, because she was sure Jadzia wouldn’t judge her and would be by her side. Sometimes, when she couldn’t sleep because of her nightmares, she would hug her pillow and pretend Jadzia was there, right beside her, hugging her with her strong arms and she felt protected. She felt safe. She could do anything with Jadzia at her side.  
But she has never about their relationship THAT way. Maybe Vic was right. Maybe her feelings for Jadzia were another thing she’d get to explore in a way she never thought she would. She hadn’t really thought about it before. It’s not that she was against relationship between two women, obviously, it was the 24th century and things like that were widely accepted. She just hadn’t thought she could be part of one.  
Kira decided to go back inside, and talk with Vic again.

\- “Look who’s back”  
\- “I’m sorry for the way I acted before. I’m just – I’m not very good with feelings”  
\- “I figured that out. Don’t worry”  
\- “About Jadzia… I thought about it. Maybe there’s more to our relationship of what I thought. M-maybe I feel something for her. I don’t – I just don’t know. I’m confused” – Kira was on the verge of crying  
\- “I know that feeling. Well, it’s not like you have to go out and kiss her on the spot. You can try exploring your feelings gradually”  
\- “But what if screw everything up? What if she does not love me? What if i ruin our friendship? I don’t want to lose her, Vic. She means everything to me”  
\- “Calm down, Major, one step at a time. We can try something here… I mean, the computer should still have an holographic model of her, after that incident with the secret agent program.”  
\- “No”  
\- “No?”  
\- “I can’t to date an holo-Jadzia. Well, I could, but I don’t want to use her image behind her back. I respect her too much. It would feel like a young man using an hologram to get off. It would be wrong. It would be like offending her, breaking her trust”  
\- “I see. Well, let me think about something, then.”  
\- “Okay. At least, talking about it made me feel better. Thanks, Vic”  
\- “Anytime, major”  
Kira started walking towards the exit  
\- “Wait! You come here, and you don’t listen to at least a song?”  
\- “Well, I guess I can stay. Only for one, though”

Kira rushed back to her quarters. She really needed to sleep now. And she slept better that she had ever slept.  
The following morning, she was in a really good mood. She even started humming one of Vic’s songs while working.  
\- “Major, I didn’t know you liked that kind of music”  
\- “Oh, captain, sorry, was I disturbing you?”  
\- “Don’t worry. A bit of music is surely needed to lighten up the atmosphere in these times of war”

Dax was in the holosuite, ready to train in Klingon martial arts, when she spotted something strange.  
\- “What? How did you manage to transfer your holographic matrix in your program?”  
\- “Julian did tell you I was a special hologram, didn’t he?” - answered Vic  
\- “And why are you here, special hologram?”  
\- “I need your help”  
\- “My help?”  
\- “Yeah. I’m trying to help Odo overcome his fear of talking with major Kira about… How can I say it… Certain aspects of human life”  
Of course it was a blatant lie. But he needed to find some way to coax them to have a date in the holosuite.  
\- “Do you mean love? Or sex?”  
\- “I was thinking more about feelings in general, but yeah, also that”  
\- “And what do you need me for?”  
\- “Well, I extracted the major’s holoimage from the computer’s archive… You do remember that accident where you were all turned into holosuite characters”  
\- “Yeah. And?”  
\- “Well, I managed to get a pretty good reconstruction of Kira’s personality and character, but I need somebody to check if I made a good job. You are the person who knows her the most, so…”  
\- “So you want me to check that. And what would I need to do?”  
\- “Well, I was thinking about simulating a date, just a dinner together, nothing special, if that’s okay with you”  
\- “So, let me get this straight. You’re saying I have to have dinner with Kira and flirt with her all evening?”  
\- “Well, if you think it’s too much I can -”  
Jadzia interrupted him  
\- “That sounds like it would be really funny. Of course I’ll help you! Can I wear a dress? Or do I need to keep my uniform?” Jadzia was really smiling at that point.  
\- “You can wear whatever you want. Make it as close as a real date as you want it to be”  
\- “That’s wonderful”  
\- “Let’s met in the holosuite at 1800 tomorrow, is that okay for you?”  
\- “It’s perfect. Bye, Vic”

Jadzia was really, really looking forward to this. Heck, flirting with Nerys without having to worry about possible consequences in their job, without having to worry about her not reciprocating her feelings, and without the risk of hurting her friendship, or even worse her friend? It was gonna be great. Plus, many species still viewed men as the ones who had to make the first move in relationship, so now she had the chance to dust off her skills.

Vic now had only to convince Kira to get into the holosuite for the date without giving away any details about his plan.  
\- “Vic Fontaine to Kira”- chirped Kira’s commbadge  
\- “How did you…? Nevermind, what do you need?”  
\- “I found a solution to your problem”  
\- “What?”  
\- “The one about Dax”  
\- “I knew that, but how can you ‘solve’ it?”  
\- “Trust me. It’s a surprise”  
\- “Oh, great” – she hated not being in control of the situation  
\- “Come to the holosuite tomorrow at 1900. And dress well.”  
\- “Well, it does look like I don’t have any choice. See you tomorrow. Kira out”

Jadzia was now getting ready to go into the holosuite. Her dress attracted quite a few looks on the promenade, but she wasn’t there to impress them, she was on a mission.  
She entered Vic’s casino, where he was waiting for her.  
\- “Hello, Dax. You look stunning”  
\- “Thanks. Where is Nerys?”  
\- “Well, I’m having some problems with her hologram. She keeps saying she works for the secret service or something like that.”  
\- “Can I help you? Maybe, if we recalibrate the projector matrix we can fix that”  
\- “Don’t worry, I’ll sort that out. Just have fun”  
Jadzia got herself a Martini at the bar, and had a look around, but she was starting to get boring. Then she saw the band on the stage was taking a break, and they had left their instruments there. A thought crossed her mind. She climbed on the stage, and started talking to one of them.  
\- “Mind if I play something on the piano while you rest? I promise I’ll try not to make you look bad”  
\- “Go ahead”  
Jadzia got to the piano, sat down, and started playing. After discovering about Joran, she had started studying music, and got quite good at it.  
Meanwhile, Kira entered the casino. Her heart was pounding like she was getting ready for a battle. Did she mention she didn’t like to not be aware of what was going on? What was Vic plotting?  
She tried to relax. She tried to listen to the music. It was a song she had never heard before, an old Earth song, it was beautiful. She let the melody soothe her anxiety, and it worked, until she saw who was playing it. Jadzia. Was it a hologram? Was it the real deal? Well, it looked like Dax hadn’t seen her, so she decided to risk it and keep listening. Jadzia (if it really was her) never ceased to amaze her: she was so smart, an incredible scientist and now even a talented pianist?  
\- “Oh prophets” – Kira thought to herself – “She’s looking in this direction. She’s spotted me. I need to leave NOW”  
But as she was turning away, a man stopped her.  
\- “I thought you would do this” – Vic said – “Don’t you think it would be rude to leave Jadzia here, alone?”  
It sure looked like she had once again no choice.  
\- “I prepared a table for you two, far from prying eyes”  
Vic was pointing at a table far away, near, the stage.  
As Kira walked towards it, her heart started beating even faster. Her mind was full of confusion. She had never felt this nervous.  
Then she saw Jadzia, who was walking towards them.  
She was wearing a gorgeous blue dress that hugged her body gracefully, complementing her natural beauty without showing too much. It made her spots really pop, especially in the dim light of the lounge. She had never seen her wearing her hair down. She understood it, it wasn’t practical for her job, and she was serious about doing it well, but Kira had to admit to herself that Dax looked great like that.  
\- “Hi, Nerys” – Dax rarely called her by name, out of respect, but Kira loved the way Dax pronounced her name  
\- “Hi, Jadzia”  
They sat down at the table. The very instant Kira sat down, all her worries dissolved. It was always like that, with Jadzia. She felt safe, she felt loved. It just felt right.  
\- “I spotted you playing the piano. I didn’t know you were also a good piano player”  
\- “You spotted me? So that’s where those things on my neck come from?”  
Typical Jadzia. Always ready to crack a joke on something. That’s what Nerys really loved in her. Sure, she was gorgeus, and she had sometimes caught herself staring at her in Ops, what always caught her off-guard was that smile. Jadzia was always felt confidente about herself, was sure about what she felt, and lived her life without letting anything bog her down, always looking at the bright side of things.

\- “Nerys laughed” thought to herself Jadzia “that’s wonderful”. Jadzia always tried to make Nerys feel happy. She felt her friend deserved it. She felt that despite nine lifetimes of experience, she couldn’t even begin to understand how much pain Kira must have felt during her youth, during the occupation. That’s why she admired her so much: she was so strong, always ready to fight for the people she cared for and for what she felt was right.  
But she had to remember it was all an holographic simulation, and she didn’t know if she would ever be able to make Nerys feel completely happy – “Better to get back to what I can almost certainly do – Conquer holo-Kira’s heart”

\- “I’ll be your server this evening” – Vic said, interrupting them. He poured them a glass of Champagne, followed by a small plate of oysters.  
While sipping on the champagne, Jadzia pondered her next move.

\- “It’s great to see you out of uniform, for a change. It really doesn’t give you justice”  
\- “Oh, thanks, Jadzia.”

\- “What is happening” – Kira thought – “Jadzia is hitting on me? Or is she just trying to be polite?”  
Whatever it was, she liked it, so she played along.

\- “You know, I had never saw you with your hair not in a ponytail. You should do that more often. Even if it covers your spots”  
\- “Then, it’s a good thing they do go all the way down”  
\- “Really?”  
\- “They do. You can check for yourself if you want to”  
Kira blushed. How could Jadzia be so open about that, about her body? That’s was she talking about before. Jadzia had no problems opening up, both about her body and her emotion. She wished she could do that.  
\- “I-I don’t think that’s a good idea”  
\- “Why not? We’re friends. There are no secrets between us”  
Jadzia’s energy was contagious. Nerys finally started to feel confident enough to open up.  
\- “Because that could make things awkward afterwards”  
\- “Are you afraid of falling in love?”  
Jadzia wasn’t sure why she was saying that. It’s not like the real Nerys and her would talk about that, so it couldn’t be of any use for the purpose of making the simulation more realistic. It was almost like she wanted to know the answer for herself.  
\- “I really don’t know. I never thought about you that way”  
\- “Think about it now. Better yet, don’t think, give me the first answer that comes to your mind”  
\- “Yes”  
\- “Yes?”  
\- “I’m afraid I could fall in love with you”  
For the first time in a while, Jadzia had problems understanding her own feelings. It all started as a game, a way to have fun while helping Odo, but now, for some reason, Nerys’s answer made something change inside her. That “yes” made her lose her confidence. It made her heart speed up. Was she starting to feel something for Nerys? Or was she just discovering something she had always felt deep down in her heart  
\- “Me too”  
Kira thought she was dreaming. Was Jadzia really telling her she could fall in love with her? No, she must have been joking  
\- “What? - Is all that came out her mouth  
\- “I’m serious. I can see myself falling for you. And don’t think I’m not scared about it. It could ruin our friendship. Or it could make us happier that we have ever been”  
\- “I’m scared too. Maybe it’s better if we forget about it, pretend it’s never happened, and keep our relationship the way it is”  
\- “Or we could throw ourselves at each other, ignoring any rational thought, and simply try to be happy”

Vic was happy their conversation was going the way it was going, but he thought they still needed a push to make the big leap. He starts singing “I can feel you under my skin”

\- “Want to dance, Nerys?”  
\- “Yes”

They got up, and started dancing.

\- “I have to warn you, Jadzia, I’m not that good at-”  
\- “Just enjoy the moment” – whispered Jadzia, cutting her off

They were now extremely close, their bodies touching.  
Jadzia looked at Nerys’s red hair, the ridges on her nose, her smile. There was a single thing she didn’t love.  
Nerys was looking at Jadzia’s spots, following them along her face, finally settling on her eyes. She was feeling the same way.  
As they were pulling close, making their lips touch in a kiss, their combadge chirped, bringing them back to reality.

\- “There’s an emergency on the station. All senior officiers report to ops”

Vic, worried that might bust the bubble of this illusion, quickly came up with  
\- “I might have made her too real. Tapping into the station’s communication might have have been too much”

They started to rush towards the exit, Kira following Jadzia. With the corner of her eye, Dax saw Kira trip in the tail of her eye but, thinking she was an hologram, ignored her and continued running.

The day after, Dax and Sisko are having breakfast together at the replimat. Dax is however absent-minded. She was still thinking about last night. She almost kissed Nerys. What now? She can’t just go and kiss the real Kira. Or can she? 

\- “So, what is tormenting you, old man?” - asked Sisko – “You’re strangely silent today”  
\- “I was just thinking about something that happened last night”  
\- “Do you want to talk about it?”  
Just as she was thinking this, Kira appeared round the corner, presumably walking towards her quarters. Dax couldn’t help but notice she had a bruise on her cheek. As if she had fell on the floor.  
\- “Have you ever had a moment a moment of pure clarity? A moment when you were absolutely sure about something?”  
\- “It happened once. And trust me, if you don’t act immediately, you’d regret it. Doubts will come back stronger than before”  
\- “You’re right”  
As she said this, she stood up and walked towards Kira.

\- “Nerys”  
\- “Hi”  
\- “What happened to your cheek?”  
Kira was confused. Did she dream everything about last night?  
\- “I-I fell down.”  
\- “In the holosuite?”  
\- “Yes”  
Suddenly, everything was clear. Vic had played her. Last night’s Nerys was the real Nerys.  
\- “I’m so sorry. I don’t even know where to start. Vic had told me it was only an hologram. I wouldn’t have acted that way if it were the real you. I know how much you value our friendship. I wouldn’t have risked breaking it in a horrible chasing my own pleasure. I didn’t have the right to behave like I behave, risking of hurting you”  
\- “Don’t apologize. It was awesome. I needed a shock. I love how direct you are. I love your energy. I love…”  
Before she could finish to talk, Jadzia lifted her chin up, and started kissing her. She stopped, not wanting to overwhelm Nerys. Nerys pulled her closer again, in an even more passionate kiss. They did it. They finally confessed their feelings. They were happy.


End file.
